I said a bad word when I was a kid.
Mamma said that I'd be sorry for the sin that I did.
My daddy whooped me and the
preacher said shame.
And I tried like hell to change.

But I cuss,
And I smoke,
I laugh at dirty jokes.
The minor vices, man I know 'em well.
I've closed down bars.
I've l___ed in my heart.
My exes think I oughta burn in hell.
But the devil, he won't notice when I die.
Yeah, don't you figure he's got bigger fish to fry?

Politicians taking pork barrel bribes.
Crooked CEOs are getting off with no time.
Christmas Eve burglars stealing good children's toys.
(Can't say Christmas).
Holiday burglars stealing good children's toys.

I cuss,
I smoke,
I laugh at dirty jokes.
The minor vices, man I know 'em well.
I've closed down bars (yeah, many a one).
I've l___ed in my heart.
My ex thinks that I oughta burn in hell.
But the devil, won't even notice when I die. (bet he does)
Yeah, don't you figure he's got bigger fish to fry?

Serve em up!

(instrumental)

Yeah there's gonna be bonfire burning
An everlasting barbecue
But with all the bad stuff going on,
There ain't gonna be room for me and you.

'Cause we cuss,
We smoke.
We laugh at Tater's jokes.

(spoken)-> Tell one Jim.

"You know you're old when your wife says 'honey let's run upstairs and make love' and your answer is 'I cannot do both.'"

The minor vices, man we know em well.
We've closed down bars.
We've l___ed in our hearts.
Our exes think we ougta burn in hell. (you got it wrong, it's the other way round)
But the devil, he won't notice when we die.
Hey, don't you figure he's got bigger fish to fry?
Yeah don't you figure he's got bigger fish to fry?

Pass the tartar sauce

When we all get to heaven what a day of rejoicing it will be.

See also:
JustSomeLyrics
53
53.4
Adair Mouths Join in the Cold Lyrics
Juanes 13- A Dios Le Pido Lyrics