(Be very, very quiet)

(We are hunting, something)

Me and Harold m___ert were outdoors men
Set in our backwoods ways
Both members of the hunting club
Both active in the NRA (National Redneck a__ociation)

We scouted a location where we had no doubt
We'd kill the biggest buck in the world (about a 34 pointer)
Harold waited in his tree-stand
But all he seen was a squirrel.

Thing are two weeks since the season started
And neither one of us was amused
We had on real tree camo, high powered ammo
But no big game to shoot

Then we finally saw a deer as big as a horse
Harold had him in his crosshairs (shoot him!)
But that squirrel jumped off a branch above us
And landed in Harold's hair (What is that thang, get it out!!)

Harold fell off the stand
On his head he landed
Like a wimp he laid there and cried
Till I climbed on down
Picked him up off the ground
And it didn't take us long to decide
That squirrel had to die!

(ha ha ha ha ha ha ha) Goodbye Squirrel!
With black eyed peas (mmm, mmm, mmm)
Your gonna taste good to me squirrel
It's you or me

Come on outta that tree squirrel
Hey guess what
You've eaten your last nut squirrel

Me and Harold went down to the surplus store
Bought a keg of dynamite
Two baseball bats and a case of M 80's we were in for one heck of a fight
(we'll show you!)

When your huntin with dumb and dumber
Something surely bound to go wrong (now be careful)
And when Harold lit that real short fuse
I knew it wouldn't be long

When the dynamite blew
Harold's foot did too
And fingers began to fly
We were barely alive when the game warden arrived

And much to our surprise
That squirrel didn't die!
(ha ha ha ha ha ha) Goodbye squirrel!

Just one more shot
You'll be in my crock pot squirrel
You'll make a lunch
You overgrown chipmunk, squirrel

I'll skin your hide
And make a hat when it's dried
Squirrel

See also:
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