Richard O'Brien Planet, Schmanet, Janet Lyrics

(Oh Rocky...How...Could you)

I'll tell you once, I won't tell you twice.
You'd better wise up Janet Weiss.
Your apple pie don't taste too nice
You'd better wise up, Janet Weiss

I've laid the seed it should be all you need
You're as sensual as a pencil,
Wound up like an E or a first string
When we made it, did you hear a bell ring?

You got a block? Well, take my advice
You better wise up Janet Weiss.
The transducer will seduce ya.
(My feet! I can't move my feet!)
(My wheels! My God, I can't move my wheels!)
(It's as if we're glued to the spot!)
(You are! So quake with fear, you tiny fools!)
(We're trapped!)

It's something you'll get used to -
A mental mind f___ can be nice.

(You won't find Earth people quite the easy mark you imagine.
This sonic transducer - it is, I suppose, some kind of audio-vibratory physio-molecular transport device?)
(You mean...?)
(Yes, Brad, it's something we ourselves have been working on for quite some time. But it seems our friend here has found a means of perfecting it.
A device which is capable of breaking down solid matter and then projecting it through s___e and,
who knows, perhaps even time itself!)
(You mean he's going to send us to another planet?)

Planet, schmanet, Janet!

You better wise up Janet Weiss.
You better wise up, build your thighs up, You better wise up..

(And then she cried out...)