Weird Al Yankovic Will the Real Slim Shady Please Shut the Fuck Up Lyrics

Can I have your attention please?
Can I have your attention please?
Will the real slim shady please kiss my mother f___in a__
I repeat: will the real slim shady please kiss my mother f___in a__, thank you
Yo, you act like you're the only white person that can rhyme
I tie both hands behind my spine and still beat you like you committed a crime
In matter fact you did, aint you just get arrested cause your wife was in a club with some dude bein molested?
Yo,i aint tring playa hate
Hey you aint no playa
Walkin with an unloaded gun
Talking about I'm gonna spray ya
I'm a real rhyme sayer with some years on ya
You know you really want Britney Spears rib on ya
You couldn't handle that body
She's a dance
One look at your small d___
She'd be like "is that your final answer?"
Regis Filman might have to fill in
When I'm still in camp
For every spin up on my jungle gym
No offense to Detroit
But I'm from New York
Where we talk the talk and where we walk the walk
And after dark you're gone
And you've been warned we strong
So when I drop the bomb
From Long Island it's on
So the next time when you're in NYC
Leavin MTV
No it's not VET
Come see me
Put all that money up where your mouth is
Unless you spent it all on your commissary account, kid
I'm still gonna see ya
After your court day
You know the one where they figure out your child support rate
You might be a raise
But remember I aint caged
I'm an underage
And you're not the only one that's crazed
So leave your Dr. Dre's
And your empty A-K's
Bring your microphone and your pale face
Bring your daughter
Be prepared when she asks, "Yo dada, why you let that man out rap your a__?"
Yo slim shady
Yea, you the real shady
But your married wife
Acting like she still a single lady
So the real slim shady needs to shut the f___ up
Cause the last I'd heard you had got locked up
So to slim shady
This once for you baby
There's still cats on the mic that can
Out rap you daily
The real slim shady take back your platinum
Placks

And shove them up your flat platinum a__

yo act like youve never heard a whack person before
ryhmes a bore,14 minutes are up so i got one more
i had to come back so now im worse than before
ill make you snore because my tired song is boring you snore(sound)
its the return of the oh wait hold on dont try that
you heard what he sounds like are you really going to buy that
and dr dre does everything you idiot how would i sound if dre didnt lay the beats down

The world has had enough,
Eminem sounding like a 12 year-old girl on helium,
Look at him! Walking around trying to kiss Dre's a__,
Trying to impress you. "He's so weak, though."
I put Christina on blast on my new CD,
cause I tried to hit on her and she rejected me,
Sometimes I wanna jump on the stage and just let loose,
But I can't cause I sound like the squirrel on Bulwinkle the Moose

This song gets your nerves, this song gets on your nerves,
I know I'm lucky cause I got more fame than I deserve,

And that's the message that I try to give to little kids,
You can be famous and never know what talent is
I'm Slim Shady, and yes, I'm real grating,
I talk like Peter Brady, and it's irritating,
I know you're saying Slim Shady please shut up,
please shut up, please shut up

well I'm Slim Shady, and yes, I'm real grating,
I talk like Peter Brady, and it's irritating,
I know you're saying Slim Shady please shut up,
please shut up, please shut up

Of course they're gonna like me, cause I'm like a cartoon
version of Ricky Schroeder when he was on 'Silver Spoons'

I ain't nothin' but a product, packaged to be bought up,
You know a year from now I won't be thought of,
But I write about dead animals and cannibals,
cause that'll shock people and sell records... man, I hope
So if I can be ridiculous and talent less,
I guess no one is hopeless, look how bad this song is!

As for the question of who came first?
Was it Carson Daly or was it Fred Durst?

I'm sorry Slim but this is gunna hurt,
they both came closer than you ever will, jerk!

Your song is on my nerves (x2)
You're kinda lucky cuz you got more fame than you deserve.

That is the message I deliver to little kids
Your gonna become famous and never know what talent is.
Of course they gonna like you, of course they do!
Your like a cartoon version of Ricky Schroder on Silver Spoons!

You aint nothing but a product
Package to be bought-up!
You know a year from now, you won't be thought of!

So your write about dead and animals and cannibals,
And someday you'll stop dating dogs and date higher mammals.(dog woof)

And there's a million women just like me,
That think like me,
and all can see,
that Slim Shady is just a boy dealing with p___rty!
So if you agree, scream loudly with me!

Your Slim Shady,
yes your the real Shady,
you sound like Peter Brady,
you get quite irritating!
So won't the real slim shady please shut up,
please shut up, please shut up?(2x)

Yo slim shady
Yea, you the real shady
But your married wife
Acting like she still a single lady
So the real slim shady needs to shut the f___ up
Cause the last I'd heard you had got locked up
So to slim shady
This once for you baby
There's still cats on the mic that can
Out rap you daily
The real slim shady take back your platinum
Placks
And shove them up your flat platinum a__

well I'm Slim Shady, and yes, I'm real grating,
I talk like Peter Brady, and it's irritating,
I know you're saying Slim Shady please shut up,
please shut up, please shut up

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