Last night I stumbled in to a bar room
I met a girl with a pint in her purse
She was cute as two speckled puppies
And I said, Ben, you could do worse

Then I walked across
The room full of tables
I walked across her table too
And I plopped myself down in a chair
I said, hi there
She whispered, my name is Mable
And all I could say was, hi there

I said, oermit me to introduce myself
Ben Colder here
She said, ain't been no colder here
Than anyplace else

I had her almost persuaded
What happened to the
Diddle diddle do there, piano
Thank you

To slip, strip herself of her pride
Almost persuaded to slip me
A drink on the side
Log on to kill this message.

Then we danced and we danced
And we danced and we danced
That is I thought I was dancing
Till somebody stepped on my hand

Then I looked in her eyes and I saw it
The reflection of my wedding band
And I thought that sure is strange
I ain't even married
What it was is my wristwatch

I had her almost persuaded
Once more there, Hargis

To come and be my own
Smart aleck (almost persuaded) boy
Then her boyfriend came
And made me go home

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