Sarah Silverman I'm Fucking Matt Damon Lyrics

* Sarah Silverman: Hey Jimmy...it's me. I'm in ahh, a hotel...I don't know I've been on the road so long I..I don't even know what city I'm in any more to be honest. Anyway, I've been thinking about you a lot, and ahh, I've been needing to tell you something. I don't know why I haven't but it's important, I mean we've been together for so long, over 5 years, and I still haven't told you and it's just not right, so here it goes.

* Sarah Silverman: I'm f___ing Matt Damon

Matt Damon: She's f___ing Matt Damon

Sarah Silverman: I'm sorry but it's true
I'm f___ing Matt Damon

Matt Damon: She's f___ing Matt Damon

Sarah Silverman: I'm not imagining it's you
I'm f___ing Matt Damon

Matt Damon: On the bed, on the floor, on a towel by the door, in the tub, in the car, up against the mini-bar

* Sarah Silverman: I'm f___ing Matt Damon

Matt Damon: She's f___ing Matt Damon

Sarah Silverman: While you're drinking diet Snapple
I said I'm f___ing Matt Damon

Matt Damon: She said she's f___ing Matt Damon
Hey Kimmel, how do you like them apples?
Get it? 'Cause, 'cause I'm talking about her b______...

Sarah Silverman: Yeah...it's...it's funny...

* Sarah Silverman: Hey Jim, don't take it bad...Remember all the good times we had...Like the time we went fishing...And we caught a bunch of fish...Then you puked in the bucket of fish that we caught...

* Girls: Knock knock!

Boys: Who's that knocking at my door?

Girls: Imefa!

Boys: Imefa who?

Girls: I'm f___ing Matt Damon!

Boys: She's f___ing Matt Damon!

Sarah Silverman: a___yze!

Everyone: F-U-C-K Matt D-A-M-O-N...I said F-U-C-K Matt D-A-M-O-N

* Sarah Silverman: I'm f___ing Matt Damon

Matt Damon: She's f___ing Matt Damon

Sarah Silverman: And you know that I ain't lying
I said I'm f___ing Matt Damon

Matt Damon: She's f___ing Matt Damon

Sarah Silverman: Ask The Insider's Pat O'Brien

The Insider's Pat O'Brien: It's true, The Insider has confirmed that she is in fact f___ing Matt Damon

* Sarah Silverman: [Remember when] Last week when I was playing Scrabble with you online, I was f___ing Matt Damon

* Matt Damon: [Remember when] You went back and forth like an idiot to do your show and Regis and Kelly's show, she was DEFINITELY f___ing Matt Damon

* Sarah Silverman: [Remember when] I told you I was f___ing Matt Damon? I WAS f___ing Matt Damon.

* Sarah Silverman: On the bed, on the floor, on a towel by the door, in the tub, in the car, up against the mini-bar

Matt Damon: She's f___ing Matt Damon

Sarah Silverman: She's f___ing Matt Damon

Matt Damon: She's f___ing Matt Damon

Sarah Silverman: I love L.A.!

* Sarah Silverman: So, that's it...umm....I think I was clear?
Matt Damon: No, you did great.
Sarah Silverman: Oohh, it was okay. [laughs]
Matt Damon: Pretty d___ good.
Sarah Silverman: Ummm, anyway...umm, you know, we had a great run Jim and ahhh, I hope there's no hard feelings, I hope we can be friends. I'm friends with all my boyfriends, my old boyfriends. If anything isn't clear or you need closure of some kind, please please call my publicist Amy Zvi at BNCPR. So take care
Matt Damon: You know what? Stop right there....Jimmy we're out of time...sorry.
Sarah Silverman: [laughs] You are s_____d!
Matt Damon: A little bit, let's put that guitar down and go f___ Matt Damon bed...See ya Jimmy.