Frank Zappa & The Mothers of Invention Penis Dimension Lyrics
            Mark volman (vocals)
            Howard kaylan (vocals)
            Ian underwood (keyboards, woodwinds)
            Aynsley dunbar (drums)
            George duke (keyboards, trombone)
            Martin lickert (bass)
            Ruth underwood (orchestra drum set)
            Jim pons (vocals)
        
            Mark volman:
            p____ dimension.
        
            Howard kaylan:
            p____ dimension.
        
            Everybody:
            p____ dimension is worrying me.
            I can't hardly sleep at night
            'cause of p____ dimension
        
            Do you worry?
            Do you worry a lot?
        
            No!
        
            Do you worry?
            Do you worry and moan ...
            That the size of your c___ is not monsrtous enough?
        
            It's your p____ dimension!
            p____ dimension!
        
            Howard kaylan:
            Wah wah wah wah wah wah wah wah
        
            Mark volman:
            Hiya friends. now just be honest about it. did you ever consider the
            possibliity that your p____, and in the case of many dignified ladies, that the
            size of the t__ties themselves might provide
            Nts of subconscious tension? weird, twisted anxieties that could force a human
            being to have to become a politician. a policeman. a jesuit monk. a rock and
            roll guitar player. a wino. you name i
            In the case of the ladies, the ones that can't afford a silicone beef-up, may
            become writers of hot books.
        
            Howard kaylan:
            "manuel, the gardener, placed his burning phallus in her quivering
            quim."
        
            Mark volman:
            Yes, or they become carmelite nuns.
        
            Howard kaylan:
            "gonzo, the lead guitar player, placed his mutated member in her
            slithering slit." ha ha ha!
        
            Mark volman:
            Ooh, or racehorse jockeys. there is no reason why you, or your loved one should
            suffer. things are bad enough, without the size of your organ adding even more
            misery to the troubles of the world
        
            Howard kaylan:
            Right on, right on!
        
            Mark volman:
            Now, if your a lady and you've got munchkin t__s, you can console yourself
            with this age-old line from primary school:
        
            Mark volman & howard kaylan:
            Anything over a mouthful, is wasted.
        
            Mark volman:
            Yes! and isn't it the truth? and if you're a guy, one night you're at a
            party and you're trying to be cool, I mean, you aren't even wearing any
            underwear your being so cool, and somebody hits on
            One night, and looks you up and down and he says uh,
        
            Howard kaylan:
            Eight inches or less?
        
            Mark volman:
            Well let me tell you, brother, that's the time when you got to turn around
            and look that son of a b____ right between the eyes. and you got to tell him
            these words:
        
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