Went down Discount Giant, and stood in the queue,
Stared in the next trolley, like you do,
Just standing, thinking, about this and that,
Just standing thinking, There's low-fat this, reduced-fat that,
What the f___ do they do with all the fat?

And what do they do with the alcohol stuff,
The stuff they take out of the beer for poofs?
The lead out of petrol? The f__s with low tar?
What about the calories they've taken out of margarine,
Salad cream and Lean Cuisine, Heinz Baked Beans, and mushy peas?
Do they sling them into binbags and send them to Bosnia?

The bulb in the bog went, during a dump,
I'm sat in the darkness, with c___ on my rump,
Sitting, thinking, in the dark, Just sitting, thinking,
How the f___ does Stevie Wonder wipe his a___?

When the first bit of bogroll leaves b___ock cleft,
I always inspect it, to see how much t___'s left,
All those blind b______s are in the dark,
No wonder Blue Peter need sixty billion bottle tops,
Because, you know, it costs a lot to coax and train a guide dog,
To lick your a___.

©1993 The Macc Lads

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