Just got in from the local
Had to try the local brew
And i run into the local gossip and i learned a thing or two
About you local yokels
And what yous get up to
And he read me your pedigrees and I'll read em back to you

[CHORUS]
He said the local chefs a poofter
The local docs a drunk
The local priest likes little boys b__s
And the local cops a c___
I said the local cops a
What did i say?
The local cops a c___

The local mayors a f___ing d___head
His wifes the local snob,
The local bank managers a f___ing w___er and so's the local cop.
The local sparky's a f___ing cowboy
The local plumbers making a mint
The local undertakers a f___ing weirdo
And the local lawyers full of s___

[CHORUS]

The local bookie's a shonky b______
The local race is f___ing rigged
The local publican ought to be f___ing hung for watering down the p___
The local pollie's a f___ing gin jockey
And heres something else i know
The local cricket team aint worth f___ing s___
The local footy teams a f___ing joke

[CHORUS]

The local butchers full of blow flies
The local dogs are full of fleas
The local barbers a f___ing butcher
The local kids are f___ing thieves
The local car yard is a f___ing rip-off
And so's the local show
And the local cops a dead set c___ but i mentioned that a minute ago
When i said

The local chefs a poofter
The local docs a drunk
The local priest likes little boys b__s
And the local cops a c___
I said the local chefs a poofter
The local docs a drunk
The local priest likes little boys b__s
And the local cops a c___
I said the local cops a what did i say?
The local cops a c___
Big finish.
1,2,3,4
The local cops a c___

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