Dane Cook Operation - Monopoly Lyrics

I had that game Operation, remember that game Operation?
Big naked white guy. He had no pee pee at all.
He had no.. Bigok, no scrumdidly-umptious.. he had no cash and prizes.
He was like that guy from the movie Silence of the Lambs, remember,
he tucked it in... "Put the lotion in the basket... Put the LOTION
in the BASKET!!"
*guy laughs*
"You're laughing 'cause you've done it you freak!
Your a freak, your a freak!"... I used to do it...
I used to come out of my girlfriends bathroom naked, I'd be like,
"Look, I'm just like you."
I was always afraid that one time she would be like...
*WAhhhh* I'm just like you!" AGH "I'm just like you!
Shhhhhh."...
Monopoly, theres another one we had. We had Monopoly, everybody did.
Nobody liked it, everybody had it, nobody liked it.
Even if you thinked you liked the game, you didn't.
And it's simple why, ready.
Cause this is anyone here 2 and a half hours into a game of Monopoly,
ready?...
*Booush* "f___ THIS GAME! It's 4 in the morning grandma, YOU WIN!
I'm sittin on Baltic with crack! I'm paying luxury tax out the a__!
And I hate when your the banker,
where did you get the pink 50's you cheating w____!
Don't f___ing touch me grandpa, NANA is a cheating w____!
And I should cut you head off with this little doggy!"...
"We were so poor growing up, that little iron.
We had to actually use that iron, It's not funny.
It takes a long time to iron a shirt with that tiny little iron...
"Mmmmm..ooo *sizzle*... oh *sizzle* s___ hot"...