I don't care if it rains or freezes
'Long as I got my Plastic Jesus
Sittin' on the dashboard of my car.
Comes in colors, pink and pleasant
Glows in the dark 'cause it's iridescent
Take it with you when you travel far.
Get yourself a sweet Madonna
Dressed in rhinestones sittin' on a
Pedestal of abalone shell.
Goin' 90, I ain't scar-ied
'Cause I got the Virgin Mary
a**urin' me that I won't go to h***.